The Blog of hollster

Greetings to all! I am new to this forum but I hope I can learn from it and hopefully give something back to someone else. My husband and I have been together for 10 years. This is my 2nd marriage, his first. I have a 15-year-old son from my former husband and a 7-year-old with my current husband. During the last week my husband has been a royal ass and was finally diagnosed with depression and medicated for it. Thank God, because I really couldn't take another tantrum. I have been fighting with my ex for a while regarding my son. I have the sole responsibility of getting my daughter to and from daycare as well as taking care of the animals. I have anxiety and depression myself and get very bad panic attacks. Last night when I was driving my daughter home, the car started acting funny and we barely made it home before some kind of pulley and belt broke. We had to eat very quickly then get my daughter to my MIL's house so they can drive her to Utah to visit her cousins. As soon as I walked in the door, I got asked about where my son is. I explained he is with his father and just went over there yesterday. She snaps at me that he's always with his dad and she never gets to see him and what is wrong with me putting up with that and blah blah blah. Well, you know where we live and I can't remember the last time you called looking to talk to him. You are retired and home all day; I am not. I have errands and housework to do, so visitation (especially with her) is not always at the top of my list. And, my son confided in me that he doesn't really like spending time with her because of the crap that comes out of her mouth and the criticism. We all know you can't force a 15-year-old to do anything, so I don't push the issue. So, I told her it's complicated. I was ordered to sit down and explain it to her (I'm 39, not 2). My husband must have seen the "I am going to stab you in the eye with my keys look" because he grabbed my arm and said we needed to go to the auto parts store and fix the car. We said goodbye to our daughter and left. I had the worst panic attack I have had in a long time. I was almost hyperventilating, the Valium didn't work right away, I couldn't get my breathing to slow down and was about to black out. I informed my husband that this would be my last trip to her house for awhile. He actually asked me "why?". Well, if my mother had just spoken to him the way I got spoken to I would have taken her outside for a little chat. There have been other incidents, but basically she is a very bossy and overbearing person and has a way of putting you down while smiling and trying to make it sound like a compliment. So I have decided to follow Dear Abby's advice and when I must be around this woman (2x/year should be plenty), when she pulls her crap I will come back with "Why does this concern/bother you?" "I'm sorry, I wasn't aware I needed to check in with you regarding custody arrangements with my ex." And, best of all, "I"M SORRY, I HAVE PLANS THAT DAY AND CANNOT ATTEND!"